A Chosen One

Ok well, today I went home to have some dinner with the family. And as my mom was leaving to go pick some stuff up for the dinner she threw me this strange red cloth and said you grandma got you this from Israel. I’m all like ‘yes some kind of holly Israeli garb, a terrorist severed arm of some kind or maybe even a piece of cloth from the cloak of Christ or something.’ I was excited to say the least. Then it turned out to be even better than all of those combined. I opened my palms to see a cool red yarmulke. Sweet. So I put it on my head of course and walked around the room. I was not, let me clarify, not planning on doing and other Jewish customs such as breaking dishes and yelling “Mazal Tov!” Side note, those yarmulkes really stay on your head well. I was surprised. Its really quite amazing. Anyways, I go into the cupboard to get a glass for drinking. All of a sudden a glass falls out of the cupboard when I open it. I head a loud crash. However, the glass is fine but it fell onto the crock-pot containing a nice roast simmering inside. This glass cup broke the heavy duty inch thick porcelain pot type thing the crock-pot surrounded. Broke the thing in half from side to side deep in the metal casing of the crock-pot. One of the weirdest things ever. I was not planning on doing any Jewish ceremonies. But it was like Moses said if that guy is going to wear it he better break something. Well, the roast was ruined and I took off the yarmulke. There was nothing really else to say after that when I explained how the yarmulke had destroyed dinner. Nothing that is except, “Mazal Tov!”