Are Our spies in Danger
I hope that some of you have heard about that spy who got Killed in London. Well if you didn't, basically a spy was poisoned by a radioactive poison. That is really all you need to know. It is on CNN.com if you are really curious. But, what got me thinking about this was CNN's concluding statement. "Are other spies in danger?" Um their spies!! Anyways read my interview below.
Are Our Spies in Danger?
The recent poisoning of ex-spy Alexander Litvinenko has sent shock waves through the espionage community. Many spies are questioning how safe they really are in the system. Some have begun not telling even their immediate family that they are in fact spies. In a recent interview with an official at the Central Intelligence Agency, one spy Albert Scars had this to say. “It is scary really. I never knew the kind of danger I could be in one day being a spy. You never know when you could be eating food that has the highly rare radioactive isotope polonium-210 in it. This is truly a new kind of attack on the espionage community. I just wish people would come and kill you with a candle stick in the library, or a lead pipe in the billiards room, or a revolver in the conservatory, then leave through a secret passage and blame it on
Colonel Mustard like we did in the good old days.” This particular double agent has requested that his identity remain confidential due to these recent attacks on the spy community. (not to mention the fact that he accidentally told reporters that he was a double agent and that his name was Alber Scars) U.S. officials were admittedly taken aback by the recent spy murder. The first task is to figure out who in their right mind would ever want to hurt a spy? What have spies ever done that would warrant the needless and brutal slaughter of one of their highly respected individuals such as Alexander Litvinenko? Stealing secrets, living double lives that involve stealing, seduction and global deception is a business like any other. Lloyd Jackson a friend of Alexander and fellow KGB had this to say, “I just can’t understand why they would do such a thing to Alex. Sure, he turned his back on the entire Russian nation and gave government secrets to the enemy. But, does that make him a traitor? Honestly, it was so long ago. He was a retired spy. Retired!! Talk about holding some unnecessary grudges. That is just like Putin. He could never take a joke and could never just let things go. I remember one time when I gave him a swirly in 5th grade and he had my entire family executed. He always had to get even. Good times. But, this kind of foul play makes me wonder how safe it really is for me to be a spy. I got into this business for the security and of course, fame, fortune, excitement, drop-dead gorgeous women, and opportunities for cleverly placed puns. But mostly, I am in it for the security, the job safety. However, if the security and safety is gone what else is there to keep me going?” The interview with Lloyd ended with our reporting crew being bound, gagged, blindfolded, then taken out from his secret underground cave. The question still remains whether other spies are in danger for their lives, or if this was just one isolated, radioactive, spy-killing accident.
Are Our Spies in Danger?
The recent poisoning of ex-spy Alexander Litvinenko has sent shock waves through the espionage community. Many spies are questioning how safe they really are in the system. Some have begun not telling even their immediate family that they are in fact spies. In a recent interview with an official at the Central Intelligence Agency, one spy Albert Scars had this to say. “It is scary really. I never knew the kind of danger I could be in one day being a spy. You never know when you could be eating food that has the highly rare radioactive isotope polonium-210 in it. This is truly a new kind of attack on the espionage community. I just wish people would come and kill you with a candle stick in the library, or a lead pipe in the billiards room, or a revolver in the conservatory, then leave through a secret passage and blame it on
Colonel Mustard like we did in the good old days.” This particular double agent has requested that his identity remain confidential due to these recent attacks on the spy community. (not to mention the fact that he accidentally told reporters that he was a double agent and that his name was Alber Scars) U.S. officials were admittedly taken aback by the recent spy murder. The first task is to figure out who in their right mind would ever want to hurt a spy? What have spies ever done that would warrant the needless and brutal slaughter of one of their highly respected individuals such as Alexander Litvinenko? Stealing secrets, living double lives that involve stealing, seduction and global deception is a business like any other. Lloyd Jackson a friend of Alexander and fellow KGB had this to say, “I just can’t understand why they would do such a thing to Alex. Sure, he turned his back on the entire Russian nation and gave government secrets to the enemy. But, does that make him a traitor? Honestly, it was so long ago. He was a retired spy. Retired!! Talk about holding some unnecessary grudges. That is just like Putin. He could never take a joke and could never just let things go. I remember one time when I gave him a swirly in 5th grade and he had my entire family executed. He always had to get even. Good times. But, this kind of foul play makes me wonder how safe it really is for me to be a spy. I got into this business for the security and of course, fame, fortune, excitement, drop-dead gorgeous women, and opportunities for cleverly placed puns. But mostly, I am in it for the security, the job safety. However, if the security and safety is gone what else is there to keep me going?” The interview with Lloyd ended with our reporting crew being bound, gagged, blindfolded, then taken out from his secret underground cave. The question still remains whether other spies are in danger for their lives, or if this was just one isolated, radioactive, spy-killing accident.
posted by Max Castile at
11:12 PM
1 Comments:
although i promised to emit this word from my vocabulary, it works perfectly to describe this incident: sick...but funny. Personal favorite out the ridiculous quotes was "the oppurtunities for cleverly placed puns" Glad to see another article after a little break :)
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Anonymous, at 10:34 PM
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